HELLO! Happy Easter! in Melbourne we saw a blatent Paedo dressed as the easter bunny, getting kids to hold his carrott! (picture to follow)
Were in Hong Kong Pooey...where it is RTA heaven. And were funny accents don't go down well. 'HEWOO!'
We went absolutely bonkers after we worked it out at 42 hours with no sleep! Some of the conversations we have had have been mental!
We got fucked off with shitty monkey smelly bummy melbourne...its dull.
We went to the airport and hungaround for about 5 hours for our flight...luckily there was a bar!
We have been talking about ways we can accidently get a flight back to auckland, as we miss our kiwi crew. As we sat in the bar reminicsing over pictures...men at work 'ain't nothin' came on and it reminded us of Hana so we cried. And then we laughed, because we were crying, and we looked fuckin' psycho!!! Sarah kept her shades on in the bar to hide her tears STUPID BITCH. we are in mourning right now.
On our last night in Auckland we went to spookers...it was awesome...google it!
The whole gang came up to see us...and men chased us with chainsaws...one of my personal highlights was matt running in a circle away from the chainsaw man.
And another was this hobbit clown who chased lee (he's scared of clowns) and he pulled his whole wooly hat over his eyes, nose, face and chin! (sarah says 'ahhhh bless')
Sarah hated the dead babies...and at one point me and hope thought hana was screaming really loud so we clung to her...only to realise this wasn't her it was a monster!
We left with hana who had kindly decided she was taking us to the airport...she took us to Auckland town first were we hung in a Turkish kebab shop! The road looked like Hamlet Court Road..Sarah felt right at home...and they even smoked some apple flavoured tobacco shit through a water bong.
We arrived at the airport so early and we saw a man that was a women that was a man.
And we managed to keep ourselves entertained...and our slave hana stayed with us right up to security...at half 4 in the morning. We love you Hana! We felt like celebrities being waved off.
We've become addicted to facebook, but hong kong pooey have blocked it...still the internet is free so its not all bad.
Our flight to old blighty leaves in an hour...Sarahs still trying to get back to auckland but were half way home now...BOO!
Oh and i've got the SICKEST coldsore ever! And it hurts on the plane. And theres a stupid arse sitting next to us who is in the army and he's talking absolute bollocks to us...still it put us to sleep along with the alcohol!
We realise that this blog is dull...but deal with it because were feeling fucking dull and want to go back home to New Zoyland.
Sarah says 'miss you lee' Soppy fucking bitch!
Hi Kym! <3
Were off now to sit around AGAIN when our plane is RIGHT THERE! To be fed FUCKING SHIT FOOD like the frangeypanjey!
Peace Out. Bring the beat back...
brap
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Sunday, 12 April 2009
Friday, 10 April 2009
Goodbye
Today is our last day in New Zealand. BOOOO!
Our flight is at ridiculous o'clock in the morning so the plan is to head back to Auckland drop the car off and hang out for the evening. Not much to do when its GOOD FRIDAY and everythings closed.
Bars close but they can't close 'spookers'. Its like New Zealands version of the london dungeons or something??? Google it...i just did and i think i may die of an asthma attack...without having asthma!
I don't like horror movies...i get scared in Dumbo when he gets drunk...or in 'All dogs go to heaven' when the crocodile is going through the sewers.
If you look at the corn fields theres a few excellent RTA's photos. Absolutely hilarious death face shots!
Were stopping off in Melbourne on the way home...so maybe we'll have a little shop...or just head to Harold Bishops for a good ol' brew. No plan yet!
Then its the horrible flight home! And we don't want to go home.
I imagine Kym wants us to go, as we've been nothing but trouble!
They have been very good to us, and also coped very well...i haven't even been shouted at. If i spent this long with mum she would have gone mad by now!
I would like to take my last blogging opportunity to thank mum and dad...woops! i mean...KYM AND MALCOLM for putting up with us, and being amazing hosts.
And Becci for holding my hand and telling me she wuvs me.
And Matt for getting me drunk.
And Myka for throwing up on Sarah!
And Millie for jumping on Sarahs feet!
See you all at home very soon!
And our Kiwi crew...See you all soon! Fush and Chups!
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Our flight is at ridiculous o'clock in the morning so the plan is to head back to Auckland drop the car off and hang out for the evening. Not much to do when its GOOD FRIDAY and everythings closed.
Bars close but they can't close 'spookers'. Its like New Zealands version of the london dungeons or something??? Google it...i just did and i think i may die of an asthma attack...without having asthma!
I don't like horror movies...i get scared in Dumbo when he gets drunk...or in 'All dogs go to heaven' when the crocodile is going through the sewers.
If you look at the corn fields theres a few excellent RTA's photos. Absolutely hilarious death face shots!
Were stopping off in Melbourne on the way home...so maybe we'll have a little shop...or just head to Harold Bishops for a good ol' brew. No plan yet!
Then its the horrible flight home! And we don't want to go home.
I imagine Kym wants us to go, as we've been nothing but trouble!
They have been very good to us, and also coped very well...i haven't even been shouted at. If i spent this long with mum she would have gone mad by now!
I would like to take my last blogging opportunity to thank mum and dad...woops! i mean...KYM AND MALCOLM for putting up with us, and being amazing hosts.
And Becci for holding my hand and telling me she wuvs me.
And Matt for getting me drunk.
And Myka for throwing up on Sarah!
And Millie for jumping on Sarahs feet!
See you all at home very soon!
And our Kiwi crew...See you all soon! Fush and Chups!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Wednesday, 8 April 2009
THE LUGING EXPERIENCE *****
'THIS EXPERIENCE IS ONE I SHALL CHERISH FOR THE REST OF MY DAYS...IT HAS INSPIRED ME TO CONTINUE AND PROMOTE THE LUGING EXPERIENCE. IT HAS FILLED AN EMPTY PART OF MY SOUL. I FEEL COMPLETE AND AT ONE WITH THE LUGE. LUGING IS MY LIFE.'
JAMAICA WE HAVE A BOBSLED TEAM!
Being all hyped up, we jumped in babs...(whos wipers were still going...but maybe faster than before?)
We head up the road to the LUGE. We jump in a Gondola and head to the top of the mountain.
We then grab a cable cart higher up...and this is when the 'cool runnings' songs hit, and were all MEGA happy!
We went down a crazy toboggon track...with sarah zooooooooooming off, and hana shortly after screaming past me and catching air as she heads over a hill! I was a cautious driver!
This photo captures the moment Matt called us...
'hi nic, hows things?'
'things are high matt!'
'where are you?'
'were on a cable cart...call you back in 10 were lugeing!'
Shortly after we went down the faster track...i lead, and could hear sarah HOWLING like a banshee being anally raped behind me (sorry if this offends any banshees, that have been violated in this way)
Sarah is right up my arse...(not like that...) and im cursing her...'FUCK OFF! GET OUT MY FUCKING ARSE YOU TWAT!'
As we finish the race...i turn and this man goes 'sorry about that!'
Turns out sarah was miles away! Nowhere near my poo tunnel (sarahs contribution).
Heres a picture of this little asian lady...who was on her own luging...she thought we were taking pictures for the shop downstairs!
RTA!
'HEWOOO!'
We loved lugeing so much! we even decided that we were going back to Hanas to sit and watch Cool Runnings in a bath tub while singing!
But to do this...we needed our helmets!
The last photo...hana has the helmet tucked under her cardigan in her hand...see you didn't even realise!!!
I put mine in my bag...
and Sarah being the little soldier she is...sacrificed her helmet for us!
'we need a distraction for security' (professional smuggler?)
As we headed out to the Gondola thhis lady come round the corner and said ...'EXCUSE ME GUYS'
shittttttttttttt
'DO YOU REALISE YOU STILL HAVE YOUR HELMET ON?'
Sarah like a true pro replies...'OH GUYS! YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME! I FEEL LIKE A RIGHT TWAT!'
We did it!
To celebrate we went for some Thai...i didn't know what to order...and felt rushed so i said C4! it was nice though!
We headed back to Hamilton...stopped for liquour...and an oil change for grumpy barbara!
Hana sits in the back getting quietly squiffy...i sit drinking me wine...next thing we hear is 'I'VE GOT IT YOU GUYS!'
The first thing she's said in half an hour...i turn to hana and shes hanging onto Sarah's door! Its opened itself! AGAIN! Fucking barbara!
We make it home...
But no cool runnings that evening! We couldnt find the DVD! So we sat and drank sherry in our helmets. And sarah spent some quality time with lee...HER BOYFRIEND! hahaha
(hana maybe didn't take to sherry?)
Another night strolling back from their house...nnot as much singing as last time but...
i was a bit merry...
Kym woke up...about half 1. Sorry Kym. But i somehow managed to make her a cup of tea!
RESULT
We head up the road to the LUGE. We jump in a Gondola and head to the top of the mountain.
We then grab a cable cart higher up...and this is when the 'cool runnings' songs hit, and were all MEGA happy!
We went down a crazy toboggon track...with sarah zooooooooooming off, and hana shortly after screaming past me and catching air as she heads over a hill! I was a cautious driver!
This photo captures the moment Matt called us...
'hi nic, hows things?'
'things are high matt!'
'where are you?'
'were on a cable cart...call you back in 10 were lugeing!'
Shortly after we went down the faster track...i lead, and could hear sarah HOWLING like a banshee being anally raped behind me (sorry if this offends any banshees, that have been violated in this way)
Sarah is right up my arse...(not like that...) and im cursing her...'FUCK OFF! GET OUT MY FUCKING ARSE YOU TWAT!'
As we finish the race...i turn and this man goes 'sorry about that!'
Turns out sarah was miles away! Nowhere near my poo tunnel (sarahs contribution).
Heres a picture of this little asian lady...who was on her own luging...she thought we were taking pictures for the shop downstairs!
RTA!
'HEWOOO!'
We loved lugeing so much! we even decided that we were going back to Hanas to sit and watch Cool Runnings in a bath tub while singing!
But to do this...we needed our helmets!
The last photo...hana has the helmet tucked under her cardigan in her hand...see you didn't even realise!!!
I put mine in my bag...
and Sarah being the little soldier she is...sacrificed her helmet for us!
'we need a distraction for security' (professional smuggler?)
As we headed out to the Gondola thhis lady come round the corner and said ...'EXCUSE ME GUYS'
shittttttttttttt
'DO YOU REALISE YOU STILL HAVE YOUR HELMET ON?'
Sarah like a true pro replies...'OH GUYS! YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME! I FEEL LIKE A RIGHT TWAT!'
We did it!
To celebrate we went for some Thai...i didn't know what to order...and felt rushed so i said C4! it was nice though!
We headed back to Hamilton...stopped for liquour...and an oil change for grumpy barbara!
Hana sits in the back getting quietly squiffy...i sit drinking me wine...next thing we hear is 'I'VE GOT IT YOU GUYS!'
The first thing she's said in half an hour...i turn to hana and shes hanging onto Sarah's door! Its opened itself! AGAIN! Fucking barbara!
We make it home...
But no cool runnings that evening! We couldnt find the DVD! So we sat and drank sherry in our helmets. And sarah spent some quality time with lee...HER BOYFRIEND! hahaha
(hana maybe didn't take to sherry?)
Another night strolling back from their house...nnot as much singing as last time but...
i was a bit merry...
Kym woke up...about half 1. Sorry Kym. But i somehow managed to make her a cup of tea!
RESULT
SARAH? I THINK I JUST DRIBBLED ON YOUR SHOULDER!
We pick up Hana, who decided wanted to come with us to Rotarua (probably regretting in when she saw us pull up in Barbara!)
Barbara is an absolute bitch today...proper grumpy...shes jumping, has drunk four litres of oil in 4 days! and to top it off her wipers are going NON FUCKING STOP! In the FUCKING SUNSHINE. Oh we did get some looks!
The plan was to head to the Zorb balls...they're like big inflatable balls you squeeze into and they push you down a big hill!
But due to someone bouncing down the hill like a basketball earlier they've had to stop it!
So we decided to go and look at the bungey action over the road...
I saw this sign...and immediately thought it looked like Karen Pepper and Sara Wiggins!
SARAH AND HANA decided that ALL 3 OF US were going to do a belly bag bungey...or a body bag bungey...or a 'swoop'.
Considering we came to go down a hill in a ball this was a big step up.
Someone has to pull a cord to release us from the crane and drop us...Fuck that! Hana volunteered.
Apparently she was told...pull the yellow one, it will release a red tag for you to pull...which will release you!
We got cranked up about forty metres...but as this was happening a big beelay/clip fell off...and we freaked thinking we were gonna fall out...(unaware that it was a prank)
Thats us pointing at the clip on the floor...theyre reply 'HANG ON TIGHT GUYS!'
'OK YOU CAN PULL THE FIRST TAG NOW'
Hana grabs it straight away and gives it a yank...without warning...ANOTHER PRANK. Theres only one cord, and we were so unprepared for our death drop!
Hana...thinking she had to pull another cord...honestly thought she had broken it, and infact we were going to die.
In these pictures you can see the terror in her face!
Sarah on the other hand was loving it! Mentalist!
We did survive!!!
Barbara is an absolute bitch today...proper grumpy...shes jumping, has drunk four litres of oil in 4 days! and to top it off her wipers are going NON FUCKING STOP! In the FUCKING SUNSHINE. Oh we did get some looks!
The plan was to head to the Zorb balls...they're like big inflatable balls you squeeze into and they push you down a big hill!
But due to someone bouncing down the hill like a basketball earlier they've had to stop it!
So we decided to go and look at the bungey action over the road...
I saw this sign...and immediately thought it looked like Karen Pepper and Sara Wiggins!
SARAH AND HANA decided that ALL 3 OF US were going to do a belly bag bungey...or a body bag bungey...or a 'swoop'.
Considering we came to go down a hill in a ball this was a big step up.
Someone has to pull a cord to release us from the crane and drop us...Fuck that! Hana volunteered.
Apparently she was told...pull the yellow one, it will release a red tag for you to pull...which will release you!
We got cranked up about forty metres...but as this was happening a big beelay/clip fell off...and we freaked thinking we were gonna fall out...(unaware that it was a prank)
Thats us pointing at the clip on the floor...theyre reply 'HANG ON TIGHT GUYS!'
'OK YOU CAN PULL THE FIRST TAG NOW'
Hana grabs it straight away and gives it a yank...without warning...ANOTHER PRANK. Theres only one cord, and we were so unprepared for our death drop!
Hana...thinking she had to pull another cord...honestly thought she had broken it, and infact we were going to die.
In these pictures you can see the terror in her face!
Sarah on the other hand was loving it! Mentalist!
We did survive!!!
Pool Party/ BBQ
We brought some meat, and Kym kindly let everyone come round for a few bevvies and a swim!
Roadtrip to Auckland
Still the morning after...that was Sarah as she emerged...
apparently she did try to get up for her classic cars show...but fell over and realised she was definately battered, and went to bed...fully clothed!
So she decided to come with e and the others to Auckland to watch matts game, and sit in the sun!
She was hanging. BIG TIME. And a little voice emerged from the bathroom 'nicccccccccc. make me a sandwich!'
Crawled into some clothes and assumed it was just us and matt...to her suprise Lee (her 'sweetypie') and Hana were in the car- she looked ROUGHHHHHHHHHHHH!.
We had to make an emergency coca cola stop for my hangover cure. And we all decided to head to a bakery...
word of warning
if you ever see an asian bakery...DONT EAT THERE! The chicken pie sarah brought was passed around the car as it was gross!
Matt went off to coach the game, and we went and layed in the sun, recooperating.
Sarah was dead.
Hana decided to start the game 'what would you rather'
which started off with:
would you rather swim through a pool of puss, or eat a bowl of scabs
to:
would you rather have a third leg sticking out your back, or to be a purple person
and then we got advanced...
would you rather have your hands as feet, and your feet as hands...BUT also be a proffessional swimmer...
or
have one eye with 2 eyebrows, and have to wear glasses?
all light hearted really...until Sarah perks up...
WOULD YOU RATHER VOLUNTARILY FUCK YOUR DAD? OR WATCH YOUR MUM GET RAPED?
THE GAME STOPPED THERE!
Hana took us to see her mum, and to the popular 'WENDYS'.. then we headed to the beach:
apparently she did try to get up for her classic cars show...but fell over and realised she was definately battered, and went to bed...fully clothed!
So she decided to come with e and the others to Auckland to watch matts game, and sit in the sun!
She was hanging. BIG TIME. And a little voice emerged from the bathroom 'nicccccccccc. make me a sandwich!'
Crawled into some clothes and assumed it was just us and matt...to her suprise Lee (her 'sweetypie') and Hana were in the car- she looked ROUGHHHHHHHHHHHH!.
We had to make an emergency coca cola stop for my hangover cure. And we all decided to head to a bakery...
word of warning
if you ever see an asian bakery...DONT EAT THERE! The chicken pie sarah brought was passed around the car as it was gross!
Matt went off to coach the game, and we went and layed in the sun, recooperating.
Sarah was dead.
Hana decided to start the game 'what would you rather'
which started off with:
would you rather swim through a pool of puss, or eat a bowl of scabs
to:
would you rather have a third leg sticking out your back, or to be a purple person
and then we got advanced...
would you rather have your hands as feet, and your feet as hands...BUT also be a proffessional swimmer...
or
have one eye with 2 eyebrows, and have to wear glasses?
all light hearted really...until Sarah perks up...
WOULD YOU RATHER VOLUNTARILY FUCK YOUR DAD? OR WATCH YOUR MUM GET RAPED?
THE GAME STOPPED THERE!
Hana took us to see her mum, and to the popular 'WENDYS'.. then we headed to the beach:
The Circle of Life
Becci got rid of Rio for the night. And came to do my hair...
Hey, they didn't call me bigwig for nothing!
We headed to town after a few bevvies at matts. Sarah was having a 'sober night' as she needed to be up extra early to drive to a classic car exhibition...where she was going to claim the bugmobile was hers! She'd been looking forward to it for days...
STUPID BITCH hears Justin Timberlake in the bar and gets the shots in...thats the plan out the window...she went down hill from there!
We hit it hard that night...which resulted in me given about 10 dollars to a busker, because he was singing kings of leon.
Later we realised we were poor and i wanted to go back and get my money out of his guitar case!
This is Hanas Car:
And This is Us:
We had to walk back from Their house because of the busker situation! And we had a MASSIVE kareoke sesh.
I'm talking ...voices hoarse, top of the lungs, pavorotti stylie belting.
The neighbourhood watch team has been recently set up as a result probably!
We tryed to simmer down as we walked past the police station...but that ended up with us bringing in a mega mix...'woop woop is da sound of da policeeeee'
As sarah 'oinked'
Sarah's car parking skills are alot to be desired, so she practised...without the car, and by the police station...what do you think?
not too shabby hay?
As we hit the bridge...the disney songs hit in...Lion King being the one i remember most...as i was holding my bag above my head pretending it was baby simba!!!
TIMONE AND PUMBA!
We drunkenly made cucumber and ham sandwiches with pepper and mayo...DELISH!
THEN WE HIT THE SACK.
Hey, they didn't call me bigwig for nothing!
We headed to town after a few bevvies at matts. Sarah was having a 'sober night' as she needed to be up extra early to drive to a classic car exhibition...where she was going to claim the bugmobile was hers! She'd been looking forward to it for days...
STUPID BITCH hears Justin Timberlake in the bar and gets the shots in...thats the plan out the window...she went down hill from there!
We hit it hard that night...which resulted in me given about 10 dollars to a busker, because he was singing kings of leon.
Later we realised we were poor and i wanted to go back and get my money out of his guitar case!
This is Hanas Car:
And This is Us:
We had to walk back from Their house because of the busker situation! And we had a MASSIVE kareoke sesh.
I'm talking ...voices hoarse, top of the lungs, pavorotti stylie belting.
The neighbourhood watch team has been recently set up as a result probably!
We tryed to simmer down as we walked past the police station...but that ended up with us bringing in a mega mix...'woop woop is da sound of da policeeeee'
As sarah 'oinked'
Sarah's car parking skills are alot to be desired, so she practised...without the car, and by the police station...what do you think?
not too shabby hay?
As we hit the bridge...the disney songs hit in...Lion King being the one i remember most...as i was holding my bag above my head pretending it was baby simba!!!
TIMONE AND PUMBA!
We drunkenly made cucumber and ham sandwiches with pepper and mayo...DELISH!
THEN WE HIT THE SACK.
Missions Day. Sat 4th April
We woke up and it was still dark! Like 6.30!?
We jumped in babs the bug, and headed to Taupo, because last time we went we didn't see the 'huka falls'.
It was a larrrrrrrrrrvvvvvvvvvvllllllleeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy day, but suddenly we hit like major fog! Full beams fog! Couldn't see shit fog. Old lady with cataracts fog!
Then we realised after 15minutes that infact all we needed to do was clean the windows! STUPID BITCHES!
2 hours later were in Taupo (its stinky, like mums farts, dad!)
Sarah forces me to do a jet boat...and we only have an hour here because we've gotta head back for matts footie match! So i complain saying 'we can't get wet, we haven't got a change of clothes and don't have time to go back and get changed'
but Sarah being Sarah makes me do it! (just like she forces alcohol on me mum)
Its awesome...360 degrees and splashes etc! Some crazy drunk hippy drove called Neill. Sarah was dissappointed as she thought it actually went down the falls...STUPID BITCH!
My highlight was some old man...who was meant to be holding on, waving to his wife on the shore just as were doing a 360 turn! what a dickhead! haha!
Oh and we checked out the prawn farm really quickly, the lady behind the counter was too enthusiastic about prawns...'its 28 dollars if you'd like to actually meet the prawns...were open til 4!'
SCREW THAT!
We just make it home intime for matts match...listening to justin timberlake (our favourite road trip music...especially the churchy song)
I took my good camera to get some action shots of matt playing football...shame the only shot i could have taken was him getting a red card after 5 minutes!!!
But its only because...as we said 'THE REFEREES A WANKER!'
and as becci pointed out 'He's deaf dumb and blind'
and as Kym said 'is his name DICK!?'
and as Sarah pointed out 'HES A C***'
We did all stay for the whole game just to abuse the ref...who probably retired after!
We jumped in babs the bug, and headed to Taupo, because last time we went we didn't see the 'huka falls'.
It was a larrrrrrrrrrvvvvvvvvvvllllllleeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy day, but suddenly we hit like major fog! Full beams fog! Couldn't see shit fog. Old lady with cataracts fog!
Then we realised after 15minutes that infact all we needed to do was clean the windows! STUPID BITCHES!
2 hours later were in Taupo (its stinky, like mums farts, dad!)
Sarah forces me to do a jet boat...and we only have an hour here because we've gotta head back for matts footie match! So i complain saying 'we can't get wet, we haven't got a change of clothes and don't have time to go back and get changed'
but Sarah being Sarah makes me do it! (just like she forces alcohol on me mum)
Its awesome...360 degrees and splashes etc! Some crazy drunk hippy drove called Neill. Sarah was dissappointed as she thought it actually went down the falls...STUPID BITCH!
My highlight was some old man...who was meant to be holding on, waving to his wife on the shore just as were doing a 360 turn! what a dickhead! haha!
Oh and we checked out the prawn farm really quickly, the lady behind the counter was too enthusiastic about prawns...'its 28 dollars if you'd like to actually meet the prawns...were open til 4!'
SCREW THAT!
We just make it home intime for matts match...listening to justin timberlake (our favourite road trip music...especially the churchy song)
I took my good camera to get some action shots of matt playing football...shame the only shot i could have taken was him getting a red card after 5 minutes!!!
But its only because...as we said 'THE REFEREES A WANKER!'
and as becci pointed out 'He's deaf dumb and blind'
and as Kym said 'is his name DICK!?'
and as Sarah pointed out 'HES A C***'
We did all stay for the whole game just to abuse the ref...who probably retired after!
A Rough Update Of A Few Days Back!!!
We've been to lunch lots with becci! Ladies of leisure we are!
And they even sell glass bottles of coke in petrol stations! How special!
Sarah's continued to prove that she is a class A stupid bitch... by standing at the exit door of pack 'n' save waiting for it to open (to be fair i stood with her).
We've been on a bike ride...and Kyms slowly going insane! But we love her!
Oh and i've made my bed everyday, and my cups of tea are improving!
I got my tattoo! I pretended that it wasn't hurting but it did!
Kym took us all to crazy golf...if you think crazy golf is crazy...you should have seen this. Like crazy? in a weird crazy way!
Instead of there being windmills and pipes...there was teddybears that had been superglued to the turf, and golf balls drilled in to obstruct. It was mental!
Sarah was awful! The first hit...went off the green...through the fencing, over a pond and into some shrubs! Sarah does not do delicate! Its okay though...Matt took us to the driving range the next day!
By the way, kym and becci were far too good for our liking...and Rio got in a strop because he was convinced that becci had been taking a secret man to the course, and thats why she was pro!
Sarah's been dancing around the kitchen for days...shes loving it!
She said shes making up for not being able to dance at Kates house. And she proper 'ad it!
Thursdays seem to be our going out night...we went to Hopes house quickly because she was hungry...
she walks in 'HI DAD!'
grabs some popcorn, wacks it into the microwave. PING! Grabs some cheese...
'BYE DAD!'
Honestly salted hot popcorn with cheese is amazing! try it!
And they even sell glass bottles of coke in petrol stations! How special!
Sarah's continued to prove that she is a class A stupid bitch... by standing at the exit door of pack 'n' save waiting for it to open (to be fair i stood with her).
We've been on a bike ride...and Kyms slowly going insane! But we love her!
Oh and i've made my bed everyday, and my cups of tea are improving!
I got my tattoo! I pretended that it wasn't hurting but it did!
Kym took us all to crazy golf...if you think crazy golf is crazy...you should have seen this. Like crazy? in a weird crazy way!
Instead of there being windmills and pipes...there was teddybears that had been superglued to the turf, and golf balls drilled in to obstruct. It was mental!
Sarah was awful! The first hit...went off the green...through the fencing, over a pond and into some shrubs! Sarah does not do delicate! Its okay though...Matt took us to the driving range the next day!
By the way, kym and becci were far too good for our liking...and Rio got in a strop because he was convinced that becci had been taking a secret man to the course, and thats why she was pro!
Sarah's been dancing around the kitchen for days...shes loving it!
She said shes making up for not being able to dance at Kates house. And she proper 'ad it!
Thursdays seem to be our going out night...we went to Hopes house quickly because she was hungry...
she walks in 'HI DAD!'
grabs some popcorn, wacks it into the microwave. PING! Grabs some cheese...
'BYE DAD!'
Honestly salted hot popcorn with cheese is amazing! try it!
Monday, 6 April 2009
Tuesday 31st 'Music is my heroin'
How badly have i neglected this blog? I'm sorry! Back on track!!!
Ok so we decided to head back to Raglan today, we waned beach...and the shops are really nice!
New Zealand roads are great, i think i'm even okay with Roadkill? theres so much of it! Obviously...standing next to it is a different story, but in a car, im fine!
Some of it is possum, but i swear we've seen some housecats out in the middle of nowhere...clearly taken a wrong turn!
By the time we got there i was busting for a wee, and i begged the lady at vinneys (who by the way looked normal compared to the spanner who served us last week!) to open the doors early so i could wee!
She was nice enough and let us in...we even had a guided tour of the kitchen- which was a bit weird!
Anyway apparently while i was weeing, sarah asked her why she moved to Raglan and she replied 'i like apples, theres apples on trees'
or something crazy! So just as special as the last lady that worked there!
Again we were going to get a picture...but turns out she was the chef...not the waitress! and she did infact cook our food! It was nice though!
I noticed a liquor store, so i thought i'd treat myself to some vodka. (which as you'll find out later...was a bad call!)
We headed back home, dancing to Justin Timberlake, and bringing sexyback!
I don't know if i've told you already how poor Sarah's navigation is? Well its so so so poor....so when we were nearly home she asked
'nicola? can i maybe see if i can get us home without your satnavving?'
She done so well! untill she nearly missed our last turning and nearly rolled the car (thats an exageration) as she noticed the tunring so late she screamed 'YOU FUCKER!' and pulled the wheel round so hard.
It was maybe one of the funniest things she did. I don't think you'll quite understand!
Since we've been away i've taken a shining to Rap music, and R & B. Crazy i know, but we love a bit of soulja boy!
We walked to Matts house...with a few drinks in hand...in a liquor ban zone, by a police station, listening to 'Crank that'.
'What if we get caught drinking?'
'ITS A FUCKING BITTER LEMON!'
All these wrong turns-ish lead us to Flaggies! A PUB!
We were only really about 2 hours late to get to matts, and maybe a little bit intoxicated! But we got there in the end, and it was a laugh...although i very quickly went from normal, too drunk!
It hit me all at once!
We got taken home, and thats its when i got home, that i reached to get my ipod out of my bag...(i listen to it...it helps me sleep!
I'd left it at matts...so i went to grab my phone to call matt...i'd left it there!
I'd left everything at Matts...it went downhill from there...you'll have to watch the video! Which i will shortly be uploading!
I even said 'Sarah you don't understand...Music is my Heroin!'
Ok so we decided to head back to Raglan today, we waned beach...and the shops are really nice!
New Zealand roads are great, i think i'm even okay with Roadkill? theres so much of it! Obviously...standing next to it is a different story, but in a car, im fine!
Some of it is possum, but i swear we've seen some housecats out in the middle of nowhere...clearly taken a wrong turn!
By the time we got there i was busting for a wee, and i begged the lady at vinneys (who by the way looked normal compared to the spanner who served us last week!) to open the doors early so i could wee!
She was nice enough and let us in...we even had a guided tour of the kitchen- which was a bit weird!
Anyway apparently while i was weeing, sarah asked her why she moved to Raglan and she replied 'i like apples, theres apples on trees'
or something crazy! So just as special as the last lady that worked there!
Again we were going to get a picture...but turns out she was the chef...not the waitress! and she did infact cook our food! It was nice though!
I noticed a liquor store, so i thought i'd treat myself to some vodka. (which as you'll find out later...was a bad call!)
We headed back home, dancing to Justin Timberlake, and bringing sexyback!
I don't know if i've told you already how poor Sarah's navigation is? Well its so so so poor....so when we were nearly home she asked
'nicola? can i maybe see if i can get us home without your satnavving?'
She done so well! untill she nearly missed our last turning and nearly rolled the car (thats an exageration) as she noticed the tunring so late she screamed 'YOU FUCKER!' and pulled the wheel round so hard.
It was maybe one of the funniest things she did. I don't think you'll quite understand!
Since we've been away i've taken a shining to Rap music, and R & B. Crazy i know, but we love a bit of soulja boy!
We walked to Matts house...with a few drinks in hand...in a liquor ban zone, by a police station, listening to 'Crank that'.
'What if we get caught drinking?'
'ITS A FUCKING BITTER LEMON!'
All these wrong turns-ish lead us to Flaggies! A PUB!
We were only really about 2 hours late to get to matts, and maybe a little bit intoxicated! But we got there in the end, and it was a laugh...although i very quickly went from normal, too drunk!
It hit me all at once!
We got taken home, and thats its when i got home, that i reached to get my ipod out of my bag...(i listen to it...it helps me sleep!
I'd left it at matts...so i went to grab my phone to call matt...i'd left it there!
I'd left everything at Matts...it went downhill from there...you'll have to watch the video! Which i will shortly be uploading!
I even said 'Sarah you don't understand...Music is my Heroin!'
Friday, 3 April 2009
Eastenders Update
Guys...we miss you so much (not)...well i don't know- Sarah misses her friends, but im speaking for myself.
Apparently Danielle just died in Eastenders (whos Danielle?)...this makes me sad (not)
I could never move here because i'd miss Bianca and Peggy too much. (not)
And i need Justice! Janine needs to go down!
Apparently Danielle just died in Eastenders (whos Danielle?)...this makes me sad (not)
I could never move here because i'd miss Bianca and Peggy too much. (not)
And i need Justice! Janine needs to go down!
Parental Guidance 15+
PARENTAL GUIDANCE. STRONG LANGUAGE IS USED IN THIS BLOG. DEAL WITH IT, WERE POTTY MOUTHS, THIS READ IS A 15+ IF OUR LANGUAGE OFFENDS YOU MOTHER, WASH MY MOUTH OUT WITH 'EFFIN IMPERIAL LEATHER!.
SWEARING MAKES THINGS MORE COMICAL.
SWEARING MAKES THINGS MORE COMICAL.
Wednesday, 1 April 2009
Monday 30th...'it ends with Simba and Nala having a baby...this is shit!'
A quiet day in Hamilton i'm afraid...not much to report...however! We have been helping Kym with the laundry...shes enjoying having us around 24/7, pissing her off. I don't think mums really missing me, shes lieing!
Rio made us some yummy scrambled egg, and we sunbathed all morning.
Then we went and booked my tattoo, at famous daves tattoo parlour...he can't be called famous Dave and be shit can he?
Oh and praise the lord! My underwear has returned! So there isn't some perve thieving it off the line! Just Sarah!
We visit rios family, and they had the Lion king on...the dvd finished when scar got killed by the hyenas...thats not right...for any other hardcore lion king fans you will know that nala and symba have a baby at the end and the circle of life plays!
Sarah informed me. She was very dissapointed...and so was i actually!
Rio made us some yummy scrambled egg, and we sunbathed all morning.
Then we went and booked my tattoo, at famous daves tattoo parlour...he can't be called famous Dave and be shit can he?
Oh and praise the lord! My underwear has returned! So there isn't some perve thieving it off the line! Just Sarah!
We visit rios family, and they had the Lion king on...the dvd finished when scar got killed by the hyenas...thats not right...for any other hardcore lion king fans you will know that nala and symba have a baby at the end and the circle of life plays!
Sarah informed me. She was very dissapointed...and so was i actually!
Taupo 'lovers leap'
So shes been saying for days and days 'i've gotta do a bunjey, the guys at work are making bets' 'even if i chicken out, kick me off nic'
I was hoping i'd get to do this, but the crazy bitch didn't need no push, especially when they played foo fighters 'low' on the tower!
She did end up dragging Lee up there...who by the way is scared of heights! Clearly he didn't want to disappoint her by saying no!
Theres a tandem jump...and you chose your jumping position:
Anyway...after stalling to wait for the guitar solo...and then hanging onto lee to tug him off...they went down...waltz position quickly changed into 'lovers leap' position...with Sarah holding her arms out like a pidgeon/eagle.
I think i was more scared than them...although Sarah did say she was concerned she might headbutt a trout in the lake below!!!
I was hoping i'd get to do this, but the crazy bitch didn't need no push, especially when they played foo fighters 'low' on the tower!
She did end up dragging Lee up there...who by the way is scared of heights! Clearly he didn't want to disappoint her by saying no!
Theres a tandem jump...and you chose your jumping position:
Anyway...after stalling to wait for the guitar solo...and then hanging onto lee to tug him off...they went down...waltz position quickly changed into 'lovers leap' position...with Sarah holding her arms out like a pidgeon/eagle.
I think i was more scared than them...although Sarah did say she was concerned she might headbutt a trout in the lake below!!!
'im not your fucking dog!' Sunday 29th.
Matt the spewer took us to Taupo to watch his team play a footie match. Sorry SOCCER match.
We missioned in search of beer for the game...and found a liquor store next to the sally army shop and church!
We chilled in the sun...and burnt, while we watched the game and made silly comments like 'the referees a wanker'. Football hooligans at heart.
Sarah and lee decided to turn me into their fucking dog for the morning by playing FETCH.
Basically 'accidently' booting the ball for miles and as i ran to get it they would snog! Like kids. I wasn't fooling for it, and after the 2nd time refused to play dog.
Anyway we thought it was a close run game but we must have missed a few goals because apparently they won 6-3!!!
Back in Hamilton...Millie the horse/dog decided she wanted to go swimming in the river...of course this was a bad idea, as she soon realised when the current took her for a ride! Shes okay, but it was her first near death experience!
We missioned in search of beer for the game...and found a liquor store next to the sally army shop and church!
We chilled in the sun...and burnt, while we watched the game and made silly comments like 'the referees a wanker'. Football hooligans at heart.
Sarah and lee decided to turn me into their fucking dog for the morning by playing FETCH.
Basically 'accidently' booting the ball for miles and as i ran to get it they would snog! Like kids. I wasn't fooling for it, and after the 2nd time refused to play dog.
Anyway we thought it was a close run game but we must have missed a few goals because apparently they won 6-3!!!
Back in Hamilton...Millie the horse/dog decided she wanted to go swimming in the river...of course this was a bad idea, as she soon realised when the current took her for a ride! Shes okay, but it was her first near death experience!
'The Balloons'
We went to some strange version of a festival...it was a hot air baloon festival...everyone was wearing flashing bunny ears.
Approximately 80,000 people went, there was fireworks and music. They lit the baloons up intime to the music...songs like 'hot stuff' which me and Sarah really got into!
Oh and before we forget...walking to the festival we saw a dying man! He was old...and getting CPR from paramedics...Sarah being the sadistic cow that she is ...started singing the casualty theme tune.
If you think thats harsh, today she slowed down to watch some cripple on crutches...'haha cripple' she said to me...thats when she realised he only had one leg...not a stump...there was NO LEG AT ALL. And to make it worse...he saw us boggin at his no-leg.
Could have been worse i suppose...we could have been taking a photo when he looked at us!!!
Oh and the festival also kicked off 'earth hour' which meant all non-essential lighting and electricity was switched off in support.
Which meant everyone was using their mobile phones as lights to find their way off the fields!
Bec and Rio took us to see Tracey, a friend. It was her birthday and she was RATTED. She introduced us to cheesy hotdogs...sausages with cheese inside them...it was a pleasant and unexpected suprise.
She also tried to force a drink on me...after my hangover, i said no! But she just wouldn't take no for an answer and bullied me into drinking!
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Approximately 80,000 people went, there was fireworks and music. They lit the baloons up intime to the music...songs like 'hot stuff' which me and Sarah really got into!
Oh and before we forget...walking to the festival we saw a dying man! He was old...and getting CPR from paramedics...Sarah being the sadistic cow that she is ...started singing the casualty theme tune.
If you think thats harsh, today she slowed down to watch some cripple on crutches...'haha cripple' she said to me...thats when she realised he only had one leg...not a stump...there was NO LEG AT ALL. And to make it worse...he saw us boggin at his no-leg.
Could have been worse i suppose...we could have been taking a photo when he looked at us!!!
Oh and the festival also kicked off 'earth hour' which meant all non-essential lighting and electricity was switched off in support.
Which meant everyone was using their mobile phones as lights to find their way off the fields!
Bec and Rio took us to see Tracey, a friend. It was her birthday and she was RATTED. She introduced us to cheesy hotdogs...sausages with cheese inside them...it was a pleasant and unexpected suprise.
She also tried to force a drink on me...after my hangover, i said no! But she just wouldn't take no for an answer and bullied me into drinking!
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